I’ve seen it. Most people strikingly dream out of their own in pursuit of a most rewarding passion, stepping into a gigantic leap, and risks they even take. They magically stick to chase after a career and make their own name to be known for wisdom, of impulse and of triumph. That was distinctive, and I applaud these players displayed varying marks of competence. Yet, feel sure of the truth that living in a world as competitive as anyone else, comparison becomes a lush.
When I quit my corporate job in 2018, I honestly didn’t have any financial fallback, a new career per se. It might seem obvious, it was unwise. By how much exertion I pulled over the rope for years to reach my managerial position abroad, I ripped off in seconds. Again, it was unwise. It was in fact the most foolish choice I made, “they say.”
At the crossroad of thinking whether I should return abroad if finances are not going well, I always contemplate to pray deeply and let God remind me why I was told by Him to stay home. And what I knew to be true, I am continually reminded why I am home.
It’s been almost a year now since that unreasonable choice. What should I say now? Where am I? Am I happy? Honestly, it was never easy. It never is. Again, asking myself, what do I want to journey forward in every area of my life, this year and over the next few years?
As I see the mystery, it made me realize that achieving milestones in life whether that’s in career, or relationships, all take time and intention. There is a varied depth of appreciation we can take hold of every struggle and victory.
Yet again, am I happy?
I stopped making a living.
I started living.
My soul desired a new song, He inversely tuned the melody so beautifully. My hands yearned to write, He engraved honeyed and magical words in it. My spirit desired freedom, He stretched me exceptional learning seasons for me to sink in my passions. I was in a concrete position climbing the ladder of success in a corporate world, but my heart, my heart was actually plunging to teach, write and live in the humblest community.
Finally, I found a place where I can pour my life as how Jesus Christ poured His to mine. I found a place where I can practice what He commanded in John 15:12-13, to love each other as He have loved me. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. Yes, I have found a place where He finds me.
The community life, however, will ever be a non-glamorous lifestyle. But it is the most authentic of it all. The community life caused me to listen to the voice of my heart to embrace and create my own story for God’s glory. I found the clarity that success is made known in simplest, honest and with the fullest faith as I choose my next best steps. But for the moment, I will live fully as I found my way back to writing and teaching, yes I do! Only by His grace alone.
There are many Christian and Missionary stories which we can be inspired of. One of which, for me, is the story of Eric Liddell (1902-1945). Eric Liddell was a successful athlete, but fame and honor didn’t sway him from what he knew was his life calling–to preach the gospel in China. Eric was born in China, to missionary parents. He attended school in London, where he trained and became known for his athletic abilities. He went on to compete in the Olympics but remained true to his convictions. In 1925, Eric returned to China and used his skills to minister and influence many young Chinese for Christ. He was captured by the Japanese during World War II and passed away of an inoperable brain tumor during his imprisonment. His death left a great empty place in the lives and hearts of the many people who he had spent his life serving. His final written words? “It’s complete surrender.”
Like Liddell, my journeys and yours entail a complete surrender to Christ. He owns everything – the direction and the destination.